Dear Reader: a letter from Liz

Dear Reader,

Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness.

It took me years to understand

That this, too, was a gift.

A friend sent me those words by the poet Mary Oliver after my son Raphaël, a wildlife biologist and climate and environmental activist, died suddenly in February 2020. He was 25, and my world had collapsed. Was my friend actually suggesting that his death might be gift?

But after the first excruciating months, I began to see that there was deep wisdom in Oliver’s poem. Natural disasters, like those brought about by the climate and ecological emergency that defines this era, transform landscapes. But private disasters transform inner landscapes, too. In recognising the parallel between my own grief and the civilizational grief that shadows all of us, I began to sense that every catastrophe, framed as an opportunity to change and grow, can generate something radically new and vital.

Your Wild and Precious Life: On Grief, Hope and Rebellion began as a series of notes I wrote on my phone, lying on the sofa cocooned from the pandemic and lost in my own despair in the wake of Raphaël’s death. I’m a private person, so initially, I didn’t envisage writing a memoir. But as my grief began evolving into something as meaningful and generous as it was crushing, I realised I had learned lessons which might give heart to others. I hoped that by describing the small miracles that began to emerge from my box of darkness I could help others navigate both personal and existential pain, and eventually emerge– as I have done – into a state of peace and active hopefulness that once seemed impossible.

These miracles came after trying everything that might offer meaning: a grief group, a session with a medium, gardening, meditation, swimming in sub-zero temperatures, observing birds, meeting other bereaved parents, and re-engaging with activism. Each experiment showed me, in very different ways, that there is still joy to be found in this life, alongside the possibility of renewed balance on a planet in unprecedented crisis. I felt that I owed it to Raphaël, to others struggling with loss, and to the precious home that we all share, to offer what I have learned.

The result is this book. I hope it speaks to you.

Warmest wishes

Liz Jensen